Day 55 – The Video Diary

“Hi, Nancy. It’s your dad. You may not recognize me, because we actually haven’t met yet. But I just know that, whenever you’re watching this, you’re just as beautiful as I always imagined you’d be.

“I know that I haven’t been there for you, like I wanted to be. Like a good father should be. And you can’t know how sorry I am about that. But I’m thinking about you all the time, so I just wanted to give you a few pieces of the fatherly advice that maybe you missed out on.

“First off, don’t worry all the time. Worrying’s never made anything happen, and if you spend time fixating on all the reasons why you shouldn’t be happy, you won’t be. No matter what’s happening, and no matter how terrible it seems at the time, let it slide off your back. I know it seems like now is forever, but it goes so fast. Enjoy what time you have with the people who love you.

“Secondly, go easy on your mom. Raising kids is hard no matter the circumstances, and you can’t possibly know just how hard till you have some of your own. If you want to, that is.

“That’s another thing. Don’t let anyone tell you what your life should be. Don’t feel a need to be normal. There is no normal. You do what’s best for you. And if you’re wrong, that’s okay. If we didn’t make terrible decisions, we wouldn’t have anything to laugh at later. Just ask your mom to show you pictures of the hair I had when we first met if you need proof. I’d take having any hair right now, but that’s life.

“Will following your own path be scary sometimes? Absolutely. But it’s good to get scared. It’s even better to get hurt. It’s good to feel something.

“All I will ever feel for you, Nancy, is love. I will always love you. So, so much. I want you to remember that. Okay. I hope I’ll see you soon. Bye for now.”

Nancy turned off the TV, and even though she was thirty years-old, for a moment she was a little girl again.

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